15 Dec 2014 - The 'Night at the Museum : Secret of the Tomb' Premiere

December 15th, 2014.

And so, for the last time this year, I'm heading down to Leicester Square for a premiere. It's dark, it's cold, the world is a scary place..... but it's not raining and weirdly I've got a front-row spot for this one despite my late arrival.

Here's how it went down:

"It's barely past 2pm.. is it always this dark nowadays?" It's closer to 4pm, but yes.

"It's barely past 2pm.. is it always this dark nowadays?" It's closer to 4pm, but yes.

The reason for the numerous short plinths set up on the Blue Carpet becomes clear about ten minutes before we get underway : models mimicking each of the main characters will be standing on them, and almost certainly in no way impede my ability to photograph people. Argh.

The reason for the numerous short plinths set up on the Blue Carpet becomes clear about ten minutes before we get underway : models mimicking each of the main characters will be standing on them, and almost certainly in no way impede my ability to photograph people. Argh.

"Are you sure this is the most efficient way to watch illegally downloaded videos at an event?" "Sure I'm sure. Pass the popcorn"

"Are you sure this is the most efficient way to watch illegally downloaded videos at an event?"
"Sure I'm sure. Pass the popcorn"

"Of course this will work on Owen Wilson. I've successfully imitated Emma Stone and Angelina Jolie like this and gotten into all kinds of club."

"Of course this will work on Owen Wilson. I've successfully imitated Emma Stone and Angelina Jolie like this and gotten into all kinds of club."

Our first arrival is comedian (and Golden Globe winner) Ricky Gervais. By his usual standards, his presence in this movie almost counts as a serious dramatic role.

Our first arrival is comedian (and Golden Globe winner) Ricky Gervais. By his usual standards, his presence in this movie almost counts as a serious dramatic role.

I photographed Sir Ben Kingsley as little as two premieres ago at "Exodus : Gods and Kings".. and since I'm very tired and this journal is already looking a bit on the long side, I might skip further photos of him in favour of (inevitably) the pretty Alice Eve.

I photographed Sir Ben Kingsley as little as two premieres ago at "Exodus : Gods and Kings".. and since I'm very tired and this journal is already looking a bit on the long side, I might skip further photos of him in favour of (inevitably) the pretty Alice Eve.

"I can't sign and authorise this Downton Abbey fanfic. Mainly because I'm no longer in that show... but good luck with it." Dan Stevens was in 25 episodes of that show.

"I can't sign and authorise this Downton Abbey fanfic. Mainly because I'm no longer in that show... but good luck with it." Dan Stevens was in 25 episodes of that show.

"Your fanfic puts me BACK INTO Downton Abbey? Okay, I'm listening"

"Your fanfic puts me BACK INTO Downton Abbey? Okay, I'm listening"

"I know who you are. But I just want to take some photos of my kids if you don't mind." Dan Stevens : now aggressively photobombing your family portraits.

"I know who you are. But I just want to take some photos of my kids if you don't mind." Dan Stevens : now aggressively photobombing your family portraits.

"That boom mike you're holding is amazing. Truly." Shawn Levy is the director of the film, and the two other ones in the trilogy.

"That boom mike you're holding is amazing. Truly." Shawn Levy is the director of the film, and the two other ones in the trilogy.

Shawn Levy also directed the Hugh Jackman boxing movie "Real Steel" which I actually, honestly, think is a brilliant movie. How much so? Let's just say that when Mr Levy came to sign autographs in our area, I put down my camera and also got an autograph.

Shawn Levy also directed the Hugh Jackman boxing movie "Real Steel" which I actually, honestly, think is a brilliant movie. How much so? Let's just say that when Mr Levy came to sign autographs in our area, I put down my camera and also got an autograph.

"A guy. Not this tall but a GROWN ASS MAN.... loves "Real Steel". It's true!!" It's true. I'm not that tall. And I do love that movie.

"A guy. Not this tall but a GROWN ASS MAN.... loves "Real Steel". It's true!!" It's true. I'm not that tall. And I do love that movie.

Our next arrival is also our main star : Ben Stiller, who is (still) best known for writing, directing and starring in "Zoolander (2001)", which, okay, isn't quite as awesome as Real Steel... but is still pretty awesome. Make that sequel already!

Our next arrival is also our main star : Ben Stiller, who is (still) best known for writing, directing and starring in "Zoolander (2001)", which, okay, isn't quite as awesome as Real Steel... but is still pretty awesome. Make that sequel already!

"Everyone always asks me about Zoolander 2... but what about Dodgeball 2??" I liked the first Dodgeball movie too!! (My movie tastes cut a wide swathe from Pixar to Boxing Robot films to Scifi, Zombie and even the odd historical Drama. Best movies for me this year : "The Lego Movie" and "Her")

"Everyone always asks me about Zoolander 2... but what about Dodgeball 2??" I liked the first Dodgeball movie too!! (My movie tastes cut a wide swathe from Pixar to Boxing Robot films to Scifi, Zombie and even the odd historical Drama. Best movies for me this year : "The Lego Movie" and "Her")

"Walter Mitty 2? That's a bit more unlikely". I thought that movie was under-appreciated... sorry for the mellow commentary, by the way. It's been the kind of day that makes me glad I have premieres as distractions, but aware that they can only distract you from so much.

"Walter Mitty 2? That's a bit more unlikely". I thought that movie was under-appreciated... sorry for the mellow commentary, by the way. It's been the kind of day that makes me glad I have premieres as distractions, but aware that they can only distract you from so much.

"The only difference between you and I is that I celebrate the remaining wisps of my hair. Pride. That's what it's all about"

"The only difference between you and I is that I celebrate the remaining wisps of my hair. Pride. That's what it's all about"

"I swear I did not cry during the movie "Real Steel". I cried at the end. Big difference".

"I swear I did not cry during the movie "Real Steel". I cried at the end. Big difference".

"Stop calling it Secret of the Ooze... it's Secret of the TOMB!!" Damn... was that me?

"Stop calling it Secret of the Ooze... it's Secret of the TOMB!!" Damn... was that me?

Alice Eve has only a small part in this movie, but I am happy with any pretext (including but not even limited to presence in a movie) that gets her to premieres. I mean.... if people like Terry Gilliam can show up to all kinds of movies he's not involved in, why not Alice Eve?

Alice Eve has only a small part in this movie, but I am happy with any pretext (including but not even limited to presence in a movie) that gets her to premieres. I mean.... if people like Terry Gilliam can show up to all kinds of movies he's not involved in, why not Alice Eve?

Speaking of which... here he is : TERRY GILLIAM! I conservatively estimate I've photographed him at 8x more premieres that he hasn't been involved in than premieres that he HAS (ofhand, I can only recall photographing him at "The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus", plus he did an Apple Store event to promote Zero Theorem.

Speaking of which... here he is : TERRY GILLIAM! I conservatively estimate I've photographed him at 8x more premieres that he hasn't been involved in than premieres that he HAS (ofhand, I can only recall photographing him at "The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus", plus he did an Apple Store event to promote Zero Theorem.

"Heterochromia? Now there's something I haven't heard since I read that article in wikipedia that cited me"

"Heterochromia? Now there's something I haven't heard since I read that article in wikipedia that cited me"

Alice Eve has Heterochromia Iridis - two different coloured irises. Which makes her kind of more awesome in my opinion. Possibly not enough to qualify for being a mutant in the X-Men, but she can hang out with my friends anytime.

Alice Eve has Heterochromia Iridis - two different coloured irises. Which makes her kind of more awesome in my opinion. Possibly not enough to qualify for being a mutant in the X-Men, but she can hang out with my friends anytime.

"Whe don't have that heterochrome-thing... but if Alice Eve is in your group of friends we'd like to join." And that? Is how you start a cool club that everyone who is cool wants to join.

"Whe don't have that heterochrome-thing... but if Alice Eve is in your group of friends we'd like to join." And that? Is how you start a cool club that everyone who is cool wants to join.

Creepy Caveman Guy on Plinth is creepy while Alice Eve is interviewed on stage.

Creepy Caveman Guy on Plinth is creepy while Alice Eve is interviewed on stage.

In other exciting news : this premiere is set to not only feature the reunion of Hansel and Derek (Zoolander) from the movie Zoolander, but a THIRD member of the cast is in attendance : Christine Taylor, who played Matilda in that film, and is also married to Ben Stiller.

In other exciting news : this premiere is set to not only feature the reunion of Hansel and Derek (Zoolander) from the movie Zoolander, but a THIRD member of the cast is in attendance : Christine Taylor, who played Matilda in that film, and is also married to Ben Stiller.

"Did you hear they've announced a Dodgeball 2?? I was in that movie too!!" "Yeah.. but your husband wrote and directed that movie and he would write and direct the sequel" She makes that sound like it's a BAD thing.

"Did you hear they've announced a Dodgeball 2?? I was in that movie too!!"
"Yeah.. but your husband wrote and directed that movie and he would write and direct the sequel"

She makes that sound like it's a BAD thing.

"You can get back to photoraphing people who are actually in THIS movie, if you like"

"You can get back to photoraphing people who are actually in THIS movie, if you like"

"So he was all 'are you worried about Hansel?' and I was, like, "No, I'm more worried about Gretel" " I know, right?

"So he was all 'are you worried about Hansel?' and I was, like, "No, I'm more worried about Gretel" " I know, right?

"Ever since I started doing this, nobody's asked me to sign their autograph. It's the perfect disguise!!" "No, Ben. I think they're all just freaked and weirded out by it"

"Ever since I started doing this, nobody's asked me to sign their autograph. It's the perfect disguise!!"
"No, Ben. I think they're all just freaked and weirded out by it"

"They've announced Zoolander 2 and Dodgeball 2? Well... I'm not saying another word until somebody greenlights Marmaduke 2 or Drillbit Taylor 2" I'm not sure about those... but if they're doing a sequel to Independence Day some 20yrs later, then there's still another four years for a sequel to 1998's giant asteroid movie "Armageddon".

"They've announced Zoolander 2 and Dodgeball 2? Well... I'm not saying another word until somebody greenlights Marmaduke 2 or Drillbit Taylor 2" I'm not sure about those... but if they're doing a sequel to Independence Day some 20yrs later, then there's still another four years for a sequel to 1998's giant asteroid movie "Armageddon".

Along with being Zoolander's nemisis HANSEL (so hot right now....), Owen Wilson is also possibly best known for being the voice of the lead car character Lightning McQueen in the Pixar "Cars" movies.

Along with being Zoolander's nemisis HANSEL (so hot right now....), Owen Wilson is also possibly best known for being the voice of the lead car character Lightning McQueen in the Pixar "Cars" movies.

"Starsky & Hutch? Also due for a sequel... maybe even a reboot. And they still haven't cast me in either a DC or Marvel superhero movie, John. What's that all about?"

"Starsky & Hutch? Also due for a sequel... maybe even a reboot. And they still haven't cast me in either a DC or Marvel superhero movie, John. What's that all about?"

"I just want to know how they get those abs so perfect. Sure... CG and kevlar inlays... but there's got to be steroids involved somewhere along the line, no?"

"I just want to know how they get those abs so perfect. Sure... CG and kevlar inlays... but there's got to be steroids involved somewhere along the line, no?"

Our final arrival of note is Australia's Own : Rebel Wilson. And since I've alrady admitted my undying love for Shawn Levy's "Real Steel", why not up the stakes and admit a similar love for the 2012 acapella-based comedy "Pitch Perfect" which was also very great.

Our final arrival of note is Australia's Own : Rebel Wilson. And since I've alrady admitted my undying love for Shawn Levy's "Real Steel", why not up the stakes and admit a similar love for the 2012 acapella-based comedy "Pitch Perfect" which was also very great.

"I really want Owen Wilson to sign my 'Anaconda (1997)' Bluray but I'm embarrassed about it, so just distract everyone please, Rebel". Holy 5h1t... I just remembered that Owen Wilson was in "Anaconda (1997)", along with several CG snakes, Ice Cube, J-Lo, and a Jon Voigt accent so spectacular I'm surprised it didn't get its own spin-off comedy series.

"I really want Owen Wilson to sign my 'Anaconda (1997)' Bluray but I'm embarrassed about it, so just distract everyone please, Rebel". Holy 5h1t... I just remembered that Owen Wilson was in "Anaconda (1997)", along with several CG snakes, Ice Cube, J-Lo, and a Jon Voigt accent so spectacular I'm surprised it didn't get its own spin-off comedy series.

"Guys? Just watch the movie please. As a Hollywood Star, I don't want to beg and plead... but I'll happily ask in a needy and earnest manner"

"Guys? Just watch the movie please. As a Hollywood Star, I don't want to beg and plead... but I'll happily ask in a needy and earnest manner"

Oh... and as a weird kind of bonus, my office is actually situated on the same block as The British Museum, where they actually did some filming earlier this year for THIS VERY MOVIE!

It was January 28th, ie. very cold. But they had giant hanging balloon-lights, and a horse, and I think I saw a monkey...

It was January 28th, ie. very cold. But they had giant hanging balloon-lights, and a horse, and I think I saw a monkey...

Rebel Wilson, dressed for rehearsals. Or a really laid-back evening at the nearby pub.

Rebel Wilson, dressed for rehearsals. Or a really laid-back evening at the nearby pub.

Shawn Levy (director) and Shawn Levy's Awesome Scarf (Executive Producer) lock down another scene.

Shawn Levy (director) and Shawn Levy's Awesome Scarf (Executive Producer) lock down another scene.

So... that's it, then, for 2014! One last entry for "The Archive of Movie Premieres" for the year... and hopefully more to come in 2015.

Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, and .. until then!

ps. if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals (you know... in the distant and yet immediate future), feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo or on facebook at premieresdotco.