22 Feb - The 'Grimsby' World Premiere

February 22nd, 2016.

It's been slightly over a week since The 2016 Baftas and London is currently in the grip of London Fashion Week, but I found time today for the dereliction of my commitments to fashion for the world premiere of Grimsby, a movie I hadn't known about the existance of until they announced the premiere about a week ago!

Here's how it went down...

iPhone panorama. Trust me to forget both my wide-angle GoPro and my Samyang diagonal fisheye for this premiere...

iPhone panorama. Trust me to forget both my wide-angle GoPro and my Samyang diagonal fisheye for this premiere...

Most people seem to be here to witness the cinematic unveiling of Sacha Baron Cohen's latest incarnation : "Nobby", following on the heels of The Dictator, Bruno, Borat and Ali G. But only truly cool people of rare class are here for Mark Strong.

Most people seem to be here to witness the cinematic unveiling of Sacha Baron Cohen's latest incarnation : "Nobby", following on the heels of The Dictator, Bruno, Borat and Ali G. But only truly cool people of rare class are here for Mark Strong.

Indeed, you cannot spell "Grimsby" without "Grim"

Indeed, you cannot spell "Grimsby" without "Grim"

<man in checked shirt texts> "Cute girl next to me has been staring at Sacha Baron Cohen's sideburns for ten minutes. Must Google how long it will take my facial hair to achieve such lush-ness"

<man in checked shirt texts> "Cute girl next to me has been staring at Sacha Baron Cohen's sideburns for ten minutes. Must Google how long it will take my facial hair to achieve such lush-ness"

"Yoyoyoyoyo people!! Mr Impact and DJ Cruel Regional Stereotype here to liven up the house!!"

"Yoyoyoyoyo people!! Mr Impact and DJ Cruel Regional Stereotype here to liven up the house!!"

The latent cruelty towards men unable to generate muttonchop sideburns was one thing, but now we're asking women to wear swimsuits in mid-single-digit temperatures. And I'm still kind of pissed about the sideburns....

The latent cruelty towards men unable to generate muttonchop sideburns was one thing, but now we're asking women to wear swimsuits in mid-single-digit temperatures. And I'm still kind of pissed about the sideburns....

"I've got a loaded gun next to a kid on a red carpet -- does anybody have a problem with that? --- well of course it's loaded. Do you think I can discipline a child with merely idle threats??"

"I've got a loaded gun next to a kid on a red carpet -- does anybody have a problem with that? --- well of course it's loaded. Do you think I can discipline a child with merely idle threats??"

Norman "Nobby" Grimsby's kids walk the red carpet with a mixture of insouciance, profanity, and confusion as to where the women in swimsuits came from or went to.

Norman "Nobby" Grimsby's kids walk the red carpet with a mixture of insouciance, profanity, and confusion as to where the women in swimsuits came from or went to.

"What do you mean "Am I In This Film". Firstly, that depends on what you mean by 'This Film' and secondly of course I am. Still.... if you could answer me the first question I'd appreciate it" - a nearby website assures me that this is Ricky Tomlinson.

"What do you mean "Am I In This Film". Firstly, that depends on what you mean by 'This Film' and secondly of course I am. Still.... if you could answer me the first question I'd appreciate it" - a nearby website assures me that this is Ricky Tomlinson.

"You're absolutely right, I really AM the spitting image of Young Dumbledore... I'd want my autograph too if I was ... well... me"

"You're absolutely right, I really AM the spitting image of Young Dumbledore... I'd want my autograph too if I was ... well... me"

"Are you sure that's me? I'm not saying I was always this slim... I'm just saying I was never an old, fat dude. ". I last photographed Isla Fisher (and Sacha Baron Cohen - in character as himself at the time) at the 2016 Baftas)

"Are you sure that's me? I'm not saying I was always this slim... I'm just saying I was never an old, fat dude. ". I last photographed Isla Fisher (and Sacha Baron Cohen - in character as himself at the time) at the 2016 Baftas)

"I was going to come in character as a homeless bag lady, but apparently you'd rather see my husband in budgie smugglers, slippers and a bathrobe...and me in this green dress"

"I was going to come in character as a homeless bag lady, but apparently you'd rather see my husband in budgie smugglers, slippers and a bathrobe...and me in this green dress"

"So the question is.. am I John Bradley who plays Samwell Tary on Game of Thrones or not? And would you photograph me if I wasn't?" (ps. yes, he's John Bradley)

"So the question is.. am I John Bradley who plays Samwell Tary on Game of Thrones or not? And would you photograph me if I wasn't?" (ps. yes, he's John Bradley)

"Could somebody update imdb.com please... I'm totally in this movie. I think". John Thomson is in this movie. I think.

"Could somebody update imdb.com please... I'm totally in this movie. I think". John Thomson is in this movie. I think.

"No. Seriously. Log in to imdb.com RIGHT NOW and get on this..."

"No. Seriously. Log in to imdb.com RIGHT NOW and get on this..."

"Can I interest you in a time-share on a holiday cottage?"

"Can I interest you in a time-share on a holiday cottage?"

"I know every hair you can see is perfectly in place. But what about the ones you CAN'T see?" - Annabelle Wallis plays "Marianne" in this film.

"I know every hair you can see is perfectly in place. But what about the ones you CAN'T see?" - Annabelle Wallis plays "Marianne" in this film.

Given the weird leather knurling of the dress, I'm almost inclined to add this to my London Fashion Week 2016 journal, which already contains one image from this premiere (one I'd rather hide there than put here)

Given the weird leather knurling of the dress, I'm almost inclined to add this to my London Fashion Week 2016 journal, which already contains one image from this premiere (one I'd rather hide there than put here)

"I challenged Rebel Wilson to an arm-wrestle, and quite frankly since she's not here to deny it, I crushed her like a bug". Rebel Wilson is in this film, and was in London as recently as a week ago for The 2016 Baftas and the premiere of "How to be Single", however unlike her, Gabourey Sidibe has an Oscar Nomination to her name, for 2009's "Precious". AND she is at this premiere.

"I challenged Rebel Wilson to an arm-wrestle, and quite frankly since she's not here to deny it, I crushed her like a bug". Rebel Wilson is in this film, and was in London as recently as a week ago for The 2016 Baftas and the premiere of "How to be Single", however unlike her, Gabourey Sidibe has an Oscar Nomination to her name, for 2009's "Precious". AND she is at this premiere.

"Is that a camera? What's that doing there, then?" As a non-consumer of British Culture, I am not fully clear on who "Johnny Vegas" is...but the name sounds American?

"Is that a camera? What's that doing there, then?" As a non-consumer of British Culture, I am not fully clear on who "Johnny Vegas" is...but the name sounds American?

Norman "Nobby" Grimsby briefly posed in... uh... briefs for the paparazzi, but has mercifully decided to wear a bathrobe over his fashion choices.

Norman "Nobby" Grimsby briefly posed in... uh... briefs for the paparazzi, but has mercifully decided to wear a bathrobe over his fashion choices.

Meanwhile, on the red carpet, London Fashion Week is on...

Meanwhile, on the red carpet, London Fashion Week is on...

"He asked me if I would wear a bathrobe to this premiere. I didn't answer... well, not in words, anyway" - Mark Strong is in this film, and continues to do wonders for the classiness of male bald leading men, and the aweseomeness thereof. I still have some hair... and as far as I'm concerned I can't lose the rest quickly enough

"He asked me if I would wear a bathrobe to this premiere. I didn't answer... well, not in words, anyway" - Mark Strong is in this film, and continues to do wonders for the classiness of male bald leading men, and the aweseomeness thereof. I still have some hair... and as far as I'm concerned I can't lose the rest quickly enough

"Natural Baldness is sexier than the artificial stuff. Anyone can go to a barber and get a full shave... but you're only cheating yourself and the integrity of your genetic code, people".

"Natural Baldness is sexier than the artificial stuff. Anyone can go to a barber and get a full shave... but you're only cheating yourself and the integrity of your genetic code, people".

"Are you sure this is a photo of me? It could well be Jason Statham".

"Are you sure this is a photo of me? It could well be Jason Statham".

"These sideburns have been independently checked by nuclear inspectors to ensure their stability. That said... please don't touch them"

"These sideburns have been independently checked by nuclear inspectors to ensure their stability. That said... please don't touch them"

"I jus' wanna fank youse all for cummink out here.... Even if none of youse are lookin at the stage when I'm speakin' "

"I jus' wanna fank youse all for cummink out here.... Even if none of youse are lookin at the stage when I'm speakin' "

"If Britain leaves the European Union, I say we invade Mexico. The climate there is nice... and even better, they probably wouldn't be expecting it"

"If Britain leaves the European Union, I say we invade Mexico. The climate there is nice... and even better, they probably wouldn't be expecting it"

"Furthermore, I suggest a reduction of taxes to something closer to zero. I mean... come on. I just want to pay the same tax that Starbucks, Google and Rupert Murdoch pay - how is that unreasonable?"

"Furthermore, I suggest a reduction of taxes to something closer to zero. I mean... come on. I just want to pay the same tax that Starbucks, Google and Rupert Murdoch pay - how is that unreasonable?"

"Finally, I believe we should all be nicer to each other. Next time you se somebody walking down the street texting on their mobile phone, take it off them and throw it against the nearest wall. You might save their life..."

"Finally, I believe we should all be nicer to each other. Next time you se somebody walking down the street texting on their mobile phone, take it off them and throw it against the nearest wall. You might save their life..."

"I could straighten my finger to drive the point home, but I think even at 30% bend, I've made my myself clear"

"I could straighten my finger to drive the point home, but I think even at 30% bend, I've made my myself clear"

So.. confusing though it might have been, and without being able to complain about the cold because DID YOU SEE what those ladies earlier in the journal were (not) wearing?... it's another premiere for The Archive of Movie Premieres - now well over 300 entries strong.

PS. If you want to know whenever I post a new premiere journal, feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo or on facebook by clicking here 

Until next Time!