May 31st, 2012.
So... after photographing Charlize Theron at my first ever premiere, and Scarlett Johansson at The Avengers a few months ago, the new #1 and #2 on my List Of People I'd Really Like To Photograph has been occupied by Directors Ridley Scott and Chris Nolan, both of whom have movies out this year.
This was Ridley Scott's. And here's how it, rather fantastically, went down:
So I hear Sir Ridley is finally returning to his roots and making that Romantic Comedy he's been promising for a few decades?It's totally my date movie for 2012.
That ain't no M41 Pulse Rifle... I don't think.
"The original 'Alien' may be a = masterpiece but it loses a certain something on an ipod screen..." Well, Sure.
It's a world premiere, and I've got a spot, and I've got a plan, and it involves trying to get an autograph today. A photo of Charlize Theron I took at the "Hancock premiere" back in 2008. I'd like to get it signed by Charlize Theron. Failing that, Salma Hayek. I had it with me at "Snow White and the Huntsman" but my position was not conducive to doing so.
It's Australia's own Guy Pearce - awesome in Memento, fantastic in LA Confidential. He was even good in Chris Nolan's The Prestige. Wait, no. That was Hugh Jackman.
"Wow. You remember the remake of The Time Machine?" Yes. Yes I do.
"Psssst.... Ya Wanna Buy A List?" That list pretty much summarises my top three reasons to be at this premiere (However, the girl next to me would disagree - she has a corel-drawn hand-designed Michael Fassbender portrait that all the media people were getting shots of.... A fan, then.)
Marc Streitenfeld is the composer of the score to 'Prometheus' - he's apparently done Sir Ridley Scott's last FIVE films (wait... I though Black Hawk Down was Hans Zimmer....). They were playing it throughout the premiere. Let's just say it kept crowd spirits in check, verging on vaguely scared. It's not exactly the theme from Men In Black III sung by Pitbull, in other words.
Charlize Theron has arrived. My sensei in the ways of acquiring autographs Mo has assured me that we are in the right place. (I assume he means specifically for this premiere rather than just, like, London England.)
Well.... that's another camera sensor fried. Well played, madam. If this is the improbably named "Kate Dickie" then she's in this film. And the wardrobe department presumably did not authorise this dress for use on set.
I.... should probably get that photo ready. Mo... should I be getting that photo ready for her to sign? Mo? No, not yet, apparently.
How about now? Now, Mo? Mo???
"That's hideous". Wait.. what? I have no idea who this is. Others did.
Michael Fassbender arrives and the girl next to me starts visibly shaking. As in VISIBLY SHAKING. As in... "should somebody visibly start shaking like this and not be looked at by a doctor?" Because Charlize Theron is also coming over and I am not shaking like this.
OMG. Moment of truth. Is Charlize going to criticise the poor panning motion, conflict between shake reduction system and my own camera shake, the grain at ISO800 from an older K-5, or... you know... is she thinking about what flavour icecream to have if she decides to watch the film?
This is Damon Lindelof, writer of "Lost('s Disapointing Final Episode)" as HonestTrailers would one day famously (and - spoilers - accurately) put it
It's Sir Ridley Scott!! He directed the original Alien, Blade Runner, Black Hawk Down.... and, fine, Orlando Bloom in Kingdom of Heaven and Gerard Depardieu in 1492 Conquest of Paradise.
With all due respect to Charlize Theron, Scarlett Johansson, Kristen Stewart and Reese Witherspoon whose framed photos currently occupy my wall... With Ridley Scott photographed I'm exactly one (1) Chris Nolan away from having a DIRECTORS wall with those two plus Spielberg and Cameron on my wall. (A guy can dream, right?)
Charlize Theron is still within the minimum distance whereby I have trouble formulating complex sentences. (The girl next to me passed that stage hours ago...)
After a few more interviews, Ridley Scott returns to sign more autographs. I reach for my Moleskine, because with all due respect, I don't really want Sir Ridley signing my photo of Charlize Theron
"Yes, if James Cameron makes a superior sequel to this called "PrometheusES" I will be VERY frikkin annoyed. Anybody else got any questions? No? Good. I'll keep signing"
Weirdly, Minnie Driver showed up. Either that, or an immensely talented Minnie Driver impersonator who ALSO had no specific reason to be at this premiere.
Michael Fassbender has noticed the portrait of himself being held by the lady to my immediate right. I think she burst into tears more or less immediately....
... say what you will about Michael Fassbender, or his beard, but he knows how to get a response from The Ladiez. (He did end up signing and indeed personalising the portrait drawn by the girl next to me. She.... needed some time to calm down after that.)
Although she did sign my photo, it does seem that any given chemistry between myself and Miss Theron reaches its peak when she's between 20 and 30 meters away. In a cosmic sense, that's almost nothing.
Ridley Scott thinks there might be a movie in the concept of the aforementioned Me / Charlize Theron relationship proximity factor. If there is (and there might be) I can only hope that he casts Me in the Role of Me, and Charlize Theron as herself. For... scientific accuracy, if nothing else.
Charlize Theron and a giant "ME". Can we get any more symbolic?
Nick Cave? I don't know. He has no apparent connection with this film. Though a suitably depressing Closing Credits Warble could be on the cards..
"What do you mean 'they made a sequel to The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo??' did they even CHECK to see that I can speak fluent English??". Noomi Rapace plays the lead female role in Prometheus. (Yeah... but not when I plan to watch it...)
"I swear if that role went to that cow Julia Roberts I'm gonna hunt her down..."
Very nice man. He even smiled at times 8) I feel I really should support the struggling British film industry and watch his small-budget movie...
True Confessions Time. There was one actor I didn't actually manage to photograph, and that was Logan Marshall-Green. To be fair, my mind was otherwise occupied.
*Meanwhile* here's Top Gear's Jeremy Clarkson, actually RUNNING to avoid signing autographs. And/or merely been somewhat late
Somebody watch the girl to my right. If Fassbender waves at her she might have trouble standing again...
And then, for no readily apparent reason, Salma Hayek and her purple (mauve? puce? russet?) dress showed up. Which is kind of a nice bonus - I never did get a good photo of her at the "Puss In Boots premiere" last year..
Rafe Spall is Tim Spall's son (Tim Spall played Wormtail in the Harry Potter films). Rafe in contrast was in Shaun of the Dead, Roland Emmerich's Anonymous, and is also in Prometheus
And then for no readily apparent reason Tom Hardy (aka. Bane in the upcoming Chris Nolan 'The Dark Knight Rises') showed up. I last photographed him at the premiere of "This Means War"
A short time later....
Charlize Theron leaves the cinema early. I agree... the price they're charging for Choc Tops is outrageous these days. Sadly, she and I will be taking separate modes of transportation to separate locations this evening.
Oh.... and......?
Charlize Theron joins Reese Witherspoon and Will Smith as stars who have signed photos taken by me at an earlier premiere (woo!). Big thanks to Master Sensei Mo, and of course Miss Theron.
So... was that a good premiere?
No... it was a GREAT premiere.
And it's totally going "into the archive of movie premieres" and that photo of Charlize Theron is going on my wall.
Until next time!
By the way, if you ever want to know when I post one of these journals (even if they're slightly less likely to reach such lofty heights), feel free to follow me on twitter @berndt2_photo or on facebook at premieresdotco. I certainly will be.